Chad

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December 2010

The And Finally WTF Holiday Gift Guide - 2010

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One of the things I miss most about producing a weekly wrap of odd and offbeat news around the world, "And Finally..." is our annual holiday gift guide - with the best of the strangest holiday gift ideas. Here's a list of the products that are the perfect "secret santa" gift or stocking stuffer. Don't ask me why, but there's kind of a running Squirrel theme this year. 

10. Squirrel Underpants

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For the squirrel or squirrel-lover in your life. These squirrel sized tighty-whities are sure to bring a smile to anyone's face. I have no idea if anyone has actually gotten a squirrel to wear these underpants, but $1,000 reward (not really) for anyone with a photo of an underwear-ewaring squirrel in the wild. If you have a close or budding friendship with a squirrel or know someone who has one, these are just the gift for them!  

9. Mouthwash Decanter

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I know that some people would buy this without a hint of irony. They should know as a public service that no amount of decanting will "smooth out" the flavor of mouthwash. It stings because its working people! 

8. BBQ, Cheddar Cheese, Mexican Spice Larvets

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These flavored larvets make the perfect pass around Hors D'Oeurves for your Holiday functions. Not hosting a party? Then these flavored larvets are the perfect way to thank your host for the invitation. I have actually tried these and they are really not all that bad. They are from the Evolution store in SoHo and available at their electronic retail establishment.

7. Giant Plush Microbes

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Finally, a safe way to give someone you love Swine Flu! Plush versions of microbes at 1,000,000x From the geniuses at ThinkGeek, you can pick from over 42 varieties to get just the right one for those you love and hate. 

6. Pull My Finger Fart Pen

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When you want to pull off the classic "pull my finger" joke, but have run out of gas. 

5. Nose Shower Gel Dispenser

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Because nothing makes you feel squeaky clean like green shower gel dispensed from a nostril. 

4. Suitcase Stickers

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If you're one of those people that things that the hard-working touchy feely folks of the TSA really DO have a sense of humor, then slap one of these stickers on your rollerboard and see if you make it home in time for the holidays. 

3. Looker Squirrel Chair

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Birdhouses are sooooo last year. $10,000 dollar reward (not really) for the first person to get a photo of an underwear wearing squirrel in this seat.  Half-eaten corn on the cob is not included. 

2. Turkey Timer

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If you are one of those people who only really cook around the holidays, then you probably need all the crazy help you can get. Why use an ordinary timer. Technically, this is a turkey pop-up thermometer, with raised legs when the bird reached 165 degrees on the inside. Perfect for people who are scared of under or over cooking their holiday bird. 

1. Mentally Ill Toys

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When the kid has moved on from their Ugly Dolls, Webkinz, and stuffed Teddy Bears (and they're not into microbes) its time to get them a mentally ill cuddlytoy. Nothing like a stuffed toy that is diagnosed with depression, delusion, or body image issues to really make a kid smile. The funnest part of the toy is that, after you receive one, you get a letter from "The Asylum" directing you to the creators website for a complete medical history and a recommended series of treatments. Who said that stuffed toys aren't educational?

That's it for this year... Ho Ho Hope you have a great holiday and be sure to let me know what else we should add to this gift guide. 

If you are feeling retro, here's a YouTube link for the 2008 episode.  

 

Spider-Man on Broadway is more than amazing.

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I scored one of the last few tickets to the second preview performance of Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark.  Like so many people, I have been curious about the delayed Broadway show with a ballooning budget of $65 million. By doing their previews in open view on Broadway (mainly because its the only theater that could house the production), the producers are giving the public a glimpse into the process of fine-tuning a show of this magnitude.  

With stunning acrobatics and unprecedented aerial choreography, Turn Off the Dark  is a jaw-dropping spectacle. But the show isn't all spectacle. The story, which is sure to be refined further, is served by nuanced and textured performances of the lead actors. 

Reeve Carney (Peter Parker) has a soulful voice that handles the heavier rock pieces as well as the ballads. Reeve demonstrates impressive athleticism when Peter first discovers his spider-like abilities and bounces off the walls and ceilings of his bedroom. And he is just Jennifer Damiano plays the MJ that Kirsten Dundst aimed for and missed in Spider-Man 3. I expect the easy chemistry between the two is only going to solidify further ahead of opening night.  I found myself rooting for the couple despite their "issues". 

A mythical layer was added from Ovid's Metamorphoses, with the introduction of Arachne, the first human to have been turned into a spider. Natalie Mendoza makes 8 legs extremely sexy - and even dons high heels on each of them for one number. The fact that she was performing with a concussion adds makes her performance all the more impressive. She should get a Tony just for her sheer toughness as a performer. 

 

At one point in the middle of a dizzyingly complex scene involving multiple flying Spideys, each doing their own technical work, Randall aka, "The Voice of God" aka, the dude in charge of all the moving pieces called out, "Hold". One of the swinging Spidey's was off his mark and left dangling a few feet from a platform. After a beat, Randall said, "And we were doing so well!"

The audience burst out in applause and laughter. Amazingly, that was the only technical hold of the night. There were plenty of rough spots - some more noticable than others, but when this show hits its stride, its going to absolutely blow away even the most skeptical and jaded crowds. 

 

Bono and The Edge's score was appropriately epic. The band is placed stage left, with the lead guitarist - and Reeve Carney's brother - Zane Carney's silhouette visible throughout the performance. The heavy guitar was at times relentless for me and I found myself savoring the slower ballads. 

The scene, "Pull the Trigger" in which Dr. Osborn, who has lost his staff, is visited by military generals and soldiers is like a mash up between Lady Gaga's Alejandro and Dr. Strangelove - has stuck with me for its energy. 

The sets and visual imagery of the show are second to none. Multiple verticle video panels - reminiscent of the "Marvel" multi-panel opening of their - are synchronized with artfully rendered 2D/3D sequences that make it feel like you are inside an animated comic book. 

A "chorus" of "comic book geeks" enter the performance as a sort of meta-commentary on the story - half homage and half seemingly critique of the extremes of comic book fan culture. Later in the performance, when a villain sends them rushing from the stage declaring, "We are in charge of the story now." I have to admit, I breathed a little sigh of relief.  

My biggest disappointment with the show is that I can't take my four-year-old Spider-Man super fan son to it. With a mock suicide, MJ's abusive father, Uncle Ben's death, Arachne's spider fetishism, and the overall dark and heavy rock aesthetic associated with many scenes, its definitely not for the "entire" family the way Lion King is. I think the producers should stage a monthly or weekly "kid-friendly" Turn Off the Dark: Light - a shorter version of the show that really just hits on awesome stunts and let's them see Spidey brought to life in the setting of a simpler, less intense, story arc. I know lots of parents that would pay to see that. For a more complete dad view, I did a separate post and made an additional heartfelt plea to the producers to consider this version. 

One final word of advice to potential ticket buyers: try to avoid the last ten rows or so of the orchestra. The obstructed from above (which wouldn't matter for pretty much any other show) means that you miss a small portion of some of the coolest wire work. Then again, if you're nervous about Spideys flying directly above your head, then that might just be the perfect place to sit! 

All in all, Turn off the Dark is an incredible must-see show that I suspect will be ready for prime time well ahead of opening night. I, for one, am looking forward to watching it again. I'm sure we're going to hear reports of various growing pains throughout the preview season, but none of them should keep you from seeing what I think is one of the most amazing shows to hit Broadway. 

Filed under  //   awesome   broadway   spider-man   turn off the dark